I'm going to try not to grumble/ramble but I have been astonished in the last day to overhear some mothers I know complain about their children facing reality. I don't mean reality like they all of a sudden were in a war zone, I mean reality like one child was made fun of at school, another child stopped believing in fairies. What is it about American culture (or Virginian culture?) that makes people want their children to be so sheltered? Do we really think children are so feeble minded that they need to live in a dream world? It irks me. How can we hear about what happened in France with the terrorist attacks and then worry about our 6th grader being made fun of? Okay, so I know I'm not being very sympathetic and what is big to one person is different depending on the situation. However, it's discouraging to me to see people cling to their cotton-candy versions of reality for their children instead of realizing that reality is sometimes harsh/and/or not fairyland but it is also the difficulty of reality that develops true character and the real world is also just as wondrous as any fairy tale story that we could tell our children.
Sadly, I think this desire to shelter/hide our children from hard things/and/or truth is a symptom of the sick sentimentality of our culture that is worshiped. We want our "american dream" so to speak. We want to pretend that "we make our own reality" which is far from actuality. There are always going to be terrible things that happen. There are going to be people that challenge us (and perhaps they are wrong but it could also be that they are right at times). I am far from being cynical but please, please bring me truth or the harshness of the world over an illusion of safety and fun. I want my daughter to see that there is so much value in embracing the world as it is and because of our hope in Christ we are also catalysts for change in the harsh, dire circumstances by our prayers and our actions. We are called to care for the least of these and even love our enemy. We are called not to make ourselves "god" but submit to God and humble ourselves to let every hardship refine us. What is "hard" is not bad. Sometimes what is "easy" is actually the killer of our souls making us feel like we are god and in control. God also made a world that is exceedingly wondrous and beautiful even terrifying (but this makes us realize how small we are in comparison). It is appropriate to be a little frightened but also in awe in a way that makes us go to the One who made it all and us for refuge.
Saturday, November 14, 2015
Friday, June 5, 2015
Everyone is a Beggar
"Give to everyone who asks of you, and whoever takes away what is yours, do not demand it back. Treat others the same way you want [e]them to treat you. If you love those who love you, what credit is that to you? For even sinners love those who love them. If you do good to those who do good to you, what credit is that to you? For even sinners do the same. If you lend to those from whom you expect to receive, what credit is that to you? Even sinners lend to sinners in order to receive back the same amount."
-Luke 6:30-34
I've been asking God where to go lately. He's been directing me. That's been awesome. However, I don't always listen. Nor do I always obey even when I say I will. Yeah, I am a sinner too.
Here's a story/rant about beggars.
I mentioned there are quite a few homeless/down and out people that live near by the (mostly) middle class and upper class neighborhood we live in. They go walking on the main streets and ask people for money sometimes. It's happened to me a few times and the last few days I've felt like God wants me to give someone "down and out" $20 I have burning a hole in my wallet. I missed one such prompting and said I'd listen the next time. Here's what happened.
I felt led to go to this super cute vintage/antique store just a couple of blocks from us. I walked around the block to get there and went inside. They had moved things in the store since last I'd been in and the displays were absolutely gorgeous and whimsical. Everywhere I looked was eye-candy and interesting thing after interesting thing. I wanted about half a dozen things in the store and even tried on a vintage dress. I thought of the "practical" things I could purchase as well but I could tell Miriam was getting tired and then she screamed a little (I think she's possibly getting a tooth now!) and so I decided we had better go.
As I walked out the door two people, a man and a woman, who appeared to be homeless, walked behind me. As we neared the light the woman asked me if I had some spare change. The light was changing so I said if they followed me across the intersection I'd give them some. As soon as we got across I rifled through my purse, took out my wallet, and gave them all the change in the pocket. I thought though: give them $20, but they had only asked for change, I countered. I asked them, "What do you need?" The woman told me they needed food and intended to buy some fried chicken in a bag that they could get for $2 somewhere. I thought, okay, so see they don't even need that much. Also, the man had said "You're a Christian, right?" and I responded, "Yes I am" kind of sheepishly as the prompt of giving more was still there and I was not obeying it. Then another man who was smoking a cigarette came by asking them about a bus route and before I could think further I decided to leave to avoid the smoke (mostly for Miriam) and said, "Bless you" as they thanked me. BUT here's the thing: I'm a hypocrite.
So, yeah, I gave them some money. BUT I felt like I should have given more. Would they have used if for food? I don't know for sure. Maybe they would have used it for cigarettes or alcohol or drugs even. I just don't know. But what would I have used it for? To buy another "thing." To purchase some temporary "happiness" and try to fill the void that is only filled by God. To justify my addiction to materialism comparing myself to others who are MORE indulgent than me and buy not just some "useful things" but overpriced designer clothing or fancy trinket or the like. Yeah, so I'm not as bad as that person. At least I gave them some change. Right? Right. Except that's not what God was really asking me to do. Except while they may not have used the money in the "best" way I would not have either and my "perceived needs" are all really wants anyway. You may disagree but I have a feeling that 9 times of of 10 I bet they'd use the money far more usefully to themselves overall.
In our society, just because someone has money it's often assumed that they "deserve" it. Just because I happen to be "middle class" now it's assumed that I did something or that my worth as a person is greater and I'm entitled to it. This is simply wrong. Perhaps because I have been on the lower end of the earning scale I can see that better. Perhaps because I don't "earn" money now and my work is being a stay-at-home mama and wife I don't feel I deserve it. Regardless, I think it's a misconception that someone with money "deserves" it. My "wants" do not discredit a street person's needs. My "wants" are not even better than their "wants" either. We're all beggars when it comes down to it. Everything that was given to me, in the end, is from God's grace. Jesus gave to me so I could give to others. I am blessed to be a blessing. It occurred to me, actually, that Jesus probably wants me to give my money just so I can see my spiritual poverty just as much to show them his Grace. That in itself is humbling. So, pray for me, to not just be an orator telling this story but actually obey next time. Thank you.
-Luke 6:30-34
I've been asking God where to go lately. He's been directing me. That's been awesome. However, I don't always listen. Nor do I always obey even when I say I will. Yeah, I am a sinner too.
Here's a story/rant about beggars.
I mentioned there are quite a few homeless/down and out people that live near by the (mostly) middle class and upper class neighborhood we live in. They go walking on the main streets and ask people for money sometimes. It's happened to me a few times and the last few days I've felt like God wants me to give someone "down and out" $20 I have burning a hole in my wallet. I missed one such prompting and said I'd listen the next time. Here's what happened.
I felt led to go to this super cute vintage/antique store just a couple of blocks from us. I walked around the block to get there and went inside. They had moved things in the store since last I'd been in and the displays were absolutely gorgeous and whimsical. Everywhere I looked was eye-candy and interesting thing after interesting thing. I wanted about half a dozen things in the store and even tried on a vintage dress. I thought of the "practical" things I could purchase as well but I could tell Miriam was getting tired and then she screamed a little (I think she's possibly getting a tooth now!) and so I decided we had better go.
As I walked out the door two people, a man and a woman, who appeared to be homeless, walked behind me. As we neared the light the woman asked me if I had some spare change. The light was changing so I said if they followed me across the intersection I'd give them some. As soon as we got across I rifled through my purse, took out my wallet, and gave them all the change in the pocket. I thought though: give them $20, but they had only asked for change, I countered. I asked them, "What do you need?" The woman told me they needed food and intended to buy some fried chicken in a bag that they could get for $2 somewhere. I thought, okay, so see they don't even need that much. Also, the man had said "You're a Christian, right?" and I responded, "Yes I am" kind of sheepishly as the prompt of giving more was still there and I was not obeying it. Then another man who was smoking a cigarette came by asking them about a bus route and before I could think further I decided to leave to avoid the smoke (mostly for Miriam) and said, "Bless you" as they thanked me. BUT here's the thing: I'm a hypocrite.
So, yeah, I gave them some money. BUT I felt like I should have given more. Would they have used if for food? I don't know for sure. Maybe they would have used it for cigarettes or alcohol or drugs even. I just don't know. But what would I have used it for? To buy another "thing." To purchase some temporary "happiness" and try to fill the void that is only filled by God. To justify my addiction to materialism comparing myself to others who are MORE indulgent than me and buy not just some "useful things" but overpriced designer clothing or fancy trinket or the like. Yeah, so I'm not as bad as that person. At least I gave them some change. Right? Right. Except that's not what God was really asking me to do. Except while they may not have used the money in the "best" way I would not have either and my "perceived needs" are all really wants anyway. You may disagree but I have a feeling that 9 times of of 10 I bet they'd use the money far more usefully to themselves overall.
In our society, just because someone has money it's often assumed that they "deserve" it. Just because I happen to be "middle class" now it's assumed that I did something or that my worth as a person is greater and I'm entitled to it. This is simply wrong. Perhaps because I have been on the lower end of the earning scale I can see that better. Perhaps because I don't "earn" money now and my work is being a stay-at-home mama and wife I don't feel I deserve it. Regardless, I think it's a misconception that someone with money "deserves" it. My "wants" do not discredit a street person's needs. My "wants" are not even better than their "wants" either. We're all beggars when it comes down to it. Everything that was given to me, in the end, is from God's grace. Jesus gave to me so I could give to others. I am blessed to be a blessing. It occurred to me, actually, that Jesus probably wants me to give my money just so I can see my spiritual poverty just as much to show them his Grace. That in itself is humbling. So, pray for me, to not just be an orator telling this story but actually obey next time. Thank you.
Tuesday, April 14, 2015
Holy Mischief
Time rolls on like a river. I have not posted lacking inspiration and somewhat lacking time. I love being a mama. I'm convinced it is one of the most fantastic joys one can experience. There is such delight in seeing your child grow and seeing her become more and more the little person that she was created to be. I only want to aid in this formation and by the grace of the Holy Spirit that's what I'm trying for every day.
Yet, sometimes my life feels mundane. Sometimes I even feel like cliche and I'm reaching for something more. We are slowly meeting some like-minded folks but have mostly connected with some people we wouldn't have thought to be friends with back home (which has it's merits as well). I live in a city now that I would never choose to live in apart from the great job my husband has here. We live in the *best* part of the city as far as I know. It's a bit like a small town and it has it's charms and character of some of the older architecture, a handful of indie businesses down the "Hilton" strip and traditions long held by the tight knit community inside of it. It is like a Norman Rockwell painting brought to life in a lot of ways.
Of course, there are the darker, sadder sides of things here including a homeless population that seems to wander through often. There also seems to be an overall lust for the "new" and "convenient" (at least in the wider city) which leaves blight of disheveled mom and pop businesses in it's wake. I can find myself feeling sorry for myself even though even though I truly love so much of my life and I am thankful for my family (Chris and Miriam) especially. I am thankful to be able to watch little Miri grow as well. Yet, I need to see that my purpose goes beyond the immediate. I need to know that there is something for me in this city itself and not shut myself off from the uncomfortable injustices that exist. I need to be enabled to do some "holy mischief" in the words of Shane Claiborne. Holy Mischief being a challenge to the status quo, a way to brighten and illuminate, a dare to be different in the way God calls us to be different - set apart so others might see his Holiness.
So yesterday I set out to do something I had meaning to do for months. I had painted a few signs with scriptures that I felt might speak to someone out on the street or someone just taking a walk, "The only thing that counts is faith expressing itself through love." -Galatians 5:6 "Act justly, love mercy and walk humbly with your Creator." -Micah 6:8, and one more "You are loved and worthy of love" (taken from an incredible story my high school friend told) -- see here --http://www.differentkindoflife.com/birthday/
I went out with Miriam in her stroller and hammered the signs up to a couple of telephone polls (I actually forgot the "You are loved and worthy of love" one but I intend to put that out another day). I felt so alive because I was able to do something like that. Miriam even seemed to like it. ;-) I hope that the signs speak to people in real ways. I hope it's a day brightener or a challenge to someone. I actually put one near a tavern. Ha. We will see.
I've decided that I want to make my life one that is full of this kind of Holy Mischief. I don't want to get comfortable and cozy with what's typical. I want to let my imagination go wild with God, the Creator, and by his help, bring them about. So far for me that means making those signs, greeting and engaging homeless people and speaking as the Spirit leads, and putting a "free box" in our front yard with clothes we don't need (when it's not rainy). I want to do more and see more of God's Kingdom come. Here, now, on earth as it is in Heaven. We are his children, are we not?
More Holy Mischief is to be had.
Yet, sometimes my life feels mundane. Sometimes I even feel like cliche and I'm reaching for something more. We are slowly meeting some like-minded folks but have mostly connected with some people we wouldn't have thought to be friends with back home (which has it's merits as well). I live in a city now that I would never choose to live in apart from the great job my husband has here. We live in the *best* part of the city as far as I know. It's a bit like a small town and it has it's charms and character of some of the older architecture, a handful of indie businesses down the "Hilton" strip and traditions long held by the tight knit community inside of it. It is like a Norman Rockwell painting brought to life in a lot of ways.
Of course, there are the darker, sadder sides of things here including a homeless population that seems to wander through often. There also seems to be an overall lust for the "new" and "convenient" (at least in the wider city) which leaves blight of disheveled mom and pop businesses in it's wake. I can find myself feeling sorry for myself even though even though I truly love so much of my life and I am thankful for my family (Chris and Miriam) especially. I am thankful to be able to watch little Miri grow as well. Yet, I need to see that my purpose goes beyond the immediate. I need to know that there is something for me in this city itself and not shut myself off from the uncomfortable injustices that exist. I need to be enabled to do some "holy mischief" in the words of Shane Claiborne. Holy Mischief being a challenge to the status quo, a way to brighten and illuminate, a dare to be different in the way God calls us to be different - set apart so others might see his Holiness.
So yesterday I set out to do something I had meaning to do for months. I had painted a few signs with scriptures that I felt might speak to someone out on the street or someone just taking a walk, "The only thing that counts is faith expressing itself through love." -Galatians 5:6 "Act justly, love mercy and walk humbly with your Creator." -Micah 6:8, and one more "You are loved and worthy of love" (taken from an incredible story my high school friend told) -- see here --http://www.differentkindoflife.com/birthday/
I went out with Miriam in her stroller and hammered the signs up to a couple of telephone polls (I actually forgot the "You are loved and worthy of love" one but I intend to put that out another day). I felt so alive because I was able to do something like that. Miriam even seemed to like it. ;-) I hope that the signs speak to people in real ways. I hope it's a day brightener or a challenge to someone. I actually put one near a tavern. Ha. We will see.
I've decided that I want to make my life one that is full of this kind of Holy Mischief. I don't want to get comfortable and cozy with what's typical. I want to let my imagination go wild with God, the Creator, and by his help, bring them about. So far for me that means making those signs, greeting and engaging homeless people and speaking as the Spirit leads, and putting a "free box" in our front yard with clothes we don't need (when it's not rainy). I want to do more and see more of God's Kingdom come. Here, now, on earth as it is in Heaven. We are his children, are we not?
More Holy Mischief is to be had.
Friday, January 16, 2015
2015, what what!
Alright, so on with 2015 - I know I am a little late to post something about this but hey, I have a 4 month old baby, okay? ;-)
Last year was epic and marvelous in so many ways. So many changes, for the better mostly. Moving to Virginia at the end of Spring, Chris' super job, Miriam Jubilee coming into the world and knocking our socks off (my favorite change!). I will always miss Minnesota and our friends there (and family too) but such is life. I would be lying, however, to not say how I do deeply miss them and have felt it quite a lot lately.
Virginia is a good place to live all in all. It's just not the same as Minnesota. My winter here is bearable but in a kind of November way. It's actually green (I know, weird!) but it's kind of Novembery weather as in it's cold outside just enough most of the time that you don't want to be out (well, it makes it tricky with a young baby anyway). Also, there is no snow. I never realized how beautiful and peaceful snow makes everything look. It's just cold (well, at least cold for someone whose body has become acclaimated to warmer weather - if I came here from Minnesota January I'd say this is a heat wave, but anyhow).
So, I was originally going to post about my New Year's "resolutions" of sorts. I don't know if they really are resolutions but I want to change the way I live so I guess you'd call it that. One big thing is that I feel God calling me to more faith - not faith as in let's see people get healed and raise the dead type miracle faith - faith as in just fully trusting that God knows what he's doing with me - faith that sees past my husband's and other close friends/family's shortcomings and my limitations in time, resources and geography and sees what IS there and what CAN BE there as God works and I believe. I need to have the kind of faith that hushes the humdrum and hangups and knows Jesus walking among us. Even if I'm not healing the sick or raising the dead for God I want to believe God is with me and not stifle his Spirit in my everyday life - I want to be open to whatever adventure, however ordinary.
Along with that kind of everyday faith I need to change the way I talk. I don't mean that I need to take on a southern accent, heeheh, but I need to think before I speak as much as possible and not let my tongue steer my ship like a small rudder crashing the ship into the shore. Most people don't realize that I can have a poisonous tongue and be careless with my words but I certainly can. I do this much more than I care to admit and I want to speak life and grace and truth in all circumstances instead. I want to be speaking as if speaking the very words of God (If anyone speaks, they should do so as one who speaks the very words of God. If anyone serves, they should do so with the strength God provides, so that in all things God may be praised through Jesus Christ. To him be the glory and the power for ever and ever. Amen 1 Peter 4:11). Does that mean I can never criticize? No, but I need to be very careful in doing so and pray about what words I say before I say them. More often, I want to encourage and affirm what I can than bring a critical word that is probably going to be unhelpful. It's very humbling for me to say this because I like to look good to others, but I know I need to change. Lord, help me. Help me trust and speak your truth in grace and love. Sustain me in all circumstances to live life in a resurrected and redeemed reality not based on what I see alone.
Last year was epic and marvelous in so many ways. So many changes, for the better mostly. Moving to Virginia at the end of Spring, Chris' super job, Miriam Jubilee coming into the world and knocking our socks off (my favorite change!). I will always miss Minnesota and our friends there (and family too) but such is life. I would be lying, however, to not say how I do deeply miss them and have felt it quite a lot lately.
Virginia is a good place to live all in all. It's just not the same as Minnesota. My winter here is bearable but in a kind of November way. It's actually green (I know, weird!) but it's kind of Novembery weather as in it's cold outside just enough most of the time that you don't want to be out (well, it makes it tricky with a young baby anyway). Also, there is no snow. I never realized how beautiful and peaceful snow makes everything look. It's just cold (well, at least cold for someone whose body has become acclaimated to warmer weather - if I came here from Minnesota January I'd say this is a heat wave, but anyhow).
So, I was originally going to post about my New Year's "resolutions" of sorts. I don't know if they really are resolutions but I want to change the way I live so I guess you'd call it that. One big thing is that I feel God calling me to more faith - not faith as in let's see people get healed and raise the dead type miracle faith - faith as in just fully trusting that God knows what he's doing with me - faith that sees past my husband's and other close friends/family's shortcomings and my limitations in time, resources and geography and sees what IS there and what CAN BE there as God works and I believe. I need to have the kind of faith that hushes the humdrum and hangups and knows Jesus walking among us. Even if I'm not healing the sick or raising the dead for God I want to believe God is with me and not stifle his Spirit in my everyday life - I want to be open to whatever adventure, however ordinary.
Along with that kind of everyday faith I need to change the way I talk. I don't mean that I need to take on a southern accent, heeheh, but I need to think before I speak as much as possible and not let my tongue steer my ship like a small rudder crashing the ship into the shore. Most people don't realize that I can have a poisonous tongue and be careless with my words but I certainly can. I do this much more than I care to admit and I want to speak life and grace and truth in all circumstances instead. I want to be speaking as if speaking the very words of God (If anyone speaks, they should do so as one who speaks the very words of God. If anyone serves, they should do so with the strength God provides, so that in all things God may be praised through Jesus Christ. To him be the glory and the power for ever and ever. Amen 1 Peter 4:11). Does that mean I can never criticize? No, but I need to be very careful in doing so and pray about what words I say before I say them. More often, I want to encourage and affirm what I can than bring a critical word that is probably going to be unhelpful. It's very humbling for me to say this because I like to look good to others, but I know I need to change. Lord, help me. Help me trust and speak your truth in grace and love. Sustain me in all circumstances to live life in a resurrected and redeemed reality not based on what I see alone.
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